Desperado
by TornEmotions
Summary: based off both the book "Shane" by Jack Schaefer and the 1953 movie. Not in the selection of categories, by the way.  Two years after the book/movie ended, Shane thinks about his life one starry night. Song-fic oneshot.


**Desperado**

**Author Notes**: Okay, here we go. This is my first song-fic, so please be gentle when commenting. This is purely because there aren't ANY fanfics about Shane (such a good subject for one!) and whenever I hear Desperado, I think of Shane.

**Disclaimer**: The song is Desperado – a classic, I don't know who originally wrote the song or sung it. The version I am using is Desperado by Celtic Thunder. The fan-fic is based off of Shane, the book. I am also influenced by the 1953 movie with the same title. The title of this song-fic is the same as the song. I don't own anything, though I sure wish I did! If I mangle the lyrics, please comment and correct.

**Plea**: Those of you who have read the book or watched the movie Shane and are fans, PLEASE create fanfics! Thank you! Those who haven't, **read** the book! **Watch** the movie!

"_Desperado…_

_Why don't you come to your senses?_

_Been out riding fences…for so long now"_

Shane slowly stood up and put out his campfire. He made sure the embers were completely smothered before going over to his laid out bedroll. He lay down, but a few seconds later, went to sit on a flat rock. Gazing at the stars, Shane sighed. He ran a long, slender hand through his golden hair, the sensitive yet strong fingers tousling the strand lightly. A drifter he had always been …

_You're a hard one, oh_

_But you've got your reasons_

_These things that are pleasing you,_

_Hurt you somehow…"_

Looking at Shane with his lean, slim frame, one received the impression of a gentle, kind man. Yet Shane was a gunfighter. And he was fast. **Deadly fast**. Shane glanced at his gun he wore just then. He knew he didn't feel complete not being a fighter, but his own skill set him apart from others. People knew subconsciously not to become too attached to Shane. That was smart, yet – oh how it hurt!

"_Oh, don't you draw the Queen of Diamonds, boy_

_She'll beat you if she's able,_

_And know the Queen of Hearts is always your best bet"_

'_The only time he had felt truly wanted,'_ Shane mused, _'was at Joe Starrett's place.'_ He knew he had had to leave. He just wasn't trusted by the town, he had just killed two men which stain never leaves … and Marianne had been a danger to him. **He** had been a danger to the whole Starrett family.

"_Oh you ain't getting no younger_

_The pain and the hunger_

_Are dragging you down"_

It had been two years since he had left the Starretts, through the town, Joey calling after him. Shane winced. His shoulder had never fully recovered after **that** night and was still apt to give a twinge. That wasn't the only pain, though. Shane absentmindedly rubbed his shoulder, a troubled, oddly desperate look in his aqua-blue eyes. He was all alone and now, all he wanted was a home. His greatest wish was to be loved. And he was lonely … so, _so_ lonely … (_"The pain is of walking through this world all alone…"_)

"_Don't your feet get cold in the winter, child?_

_The snow won't fall and the sun won't shine_

_It's hard to tell the nighttime from the day…"_

He didn't know how much time had passed. Did it matter, really? Did anything truly matter if there was no one to share your life with? Even on the brightest of days, Shane could only feel numb.

"_**Desperado**__!"_

He wasn't completely numb, though. It was almost mesmerizing how much one could hurt, how much your heart could feel as if razor-sharp shards of glass were driving into it deeper and deeper. How much one can break, even after feeling completely shattered.

"_It may be raining,_

_But there's a rainbow above you_

_You'd better let somebody love you_

_(echo: let somebody love you) …"_

It was daylight. Before he'd known it, Shane had spent yet another night awake. Another night spent dwelling in past memories, another night feeling himself splinter into thousands of tear-stained pieces. Shane smiled slightly, a kind, sad smile as he watched the dawn blossom in all her colorful glory. With a sigh, he packed up his things unto his horse and, after putting on his soft cowboy's hat, mounted. Pausing, Shane looked over the land, tormented. He could go back … find someone … yet it wouldn't happen. He knew this. Shane, smiling grimly, bitterly, started riding and soon disappeared over the horizon into the world.

"_Yes, you'd better let somebody love you …_

_Before it's too … late …"_


End file.
